Spotlight - Jason Rosencranz

Each week we will be picking members to spotlight to tell their Alzheimer's story and why they are running in this year's New York City marathon. Check in each day for new updates on who will be spotlighted and get to know your teammates...(each person is picked at random)

Instead of writing the traditional "who i am" (live in Philadelphia, partnered, have a dog, will host anyone for the Philadelphia races and celebrate with a roof deck barbecue), i'm going to include the entry below.  It is what I wrote as my entry into my 25th college reunion update book (it just occurred at the end of May). 

The Harvard Red Book as it is known is a wonderful tradition - you can write anything you want.  About jobs, travels, kids, divorces, etc. It is only published and given to the members of the class, and the Harvard library system. You can't find any of it online.   I wrote mine about my mother who had died the year before and made a very large positive impression on my college friends.   It gives a little bit of insight into her, into me, and into life.

Ten years ago, at our 15th reunion, Gisela Velez, Lana Janes and I were reminiscing about a day spent our freshman year with my mother at Keezer’s shopping for my first tuxedo. Sitting on the Saturday night party at Leverett House, we laughed about how my mother 20 years prior had taken over the shop, providing gentle motherly advice to clueless freshmen trying on tuxedoes that were just all wrong. It was a great memory.

I thought my mother should know how everyone was remembering her so fondly, so I gave her a call on my cell phone. She had just left the hospital a few days before following cancer surgery, and was just starting to recover.

“Where are you?” I asked.

“I’m with your brother. He drove me over to see your Aunt in Medford and we are just driving back.”

“You mean you are nearby? Why don’t you drive by, I haven’t seen you yet.”

“I’m not dressed, I can’t do that.”

“Of course you can,” I replied. After a bit of cajoling and encouragement, she agreed and had Jamie drive her over to Leverett House.

They drove up and we chatted. She was still weak, her head still bandaged, wearing a raincoat over her housedress. I realized that many at the reunion, including Cigdem, Larry, DeeAnn, Billy, Gisela, Lana, Dan, Laurel, Martha and others, would be disappointed if they knew they had missed her. So I asked if she wanted to come in and see everyone for a few minutes. She resisted, said no, but I persisted. Eventually she said she’d come in for a few minutes.

We helped her from the car and holding her by the arm, we made our way to the door. And then for a moment, like every child has at some point or another, I worried what others would think of us. Why was she bandaged up? Why was she dressed the way she was? What was she doing here? I had self-doubt and questioned what the heck I was doing. What would people think?

And then it struck me. This was her reunion as much as it was mine. She was the reason I was even standing here at our reunion. As a single mother, she encouraged, saved, cajoled, listened and struggled her way to this day. Without her efforts, I would never know each of you.

So I left any doubt at the door, took her by the arm, and we walked in and met up with some friends. She spent about 15 minutes with me, was clearly happy and proud, and forgot about her own pain for that time. Multiple people came up to say hi, she was the center of attention, and deserved it. Mom told the same stories over and over again, an early sign that Alzheimer’s was just starting. And then she left, smiling, and I beamed even more with pride for her.

And suddenly I realized I was the only one in the class of 1989 that had in effect brought my mother as my date to our 15th college reunion.

Well, in the past 10 years a few things have changed. She recently passed away from a long struggle with Alzheimer’s disease. I have a wonder partner of 7 years, Bill Fennelly, who is the love of my life and will be at reunion with me. We now live in Philadelphia with our little sweet dog Molly. I still have the fondest memories of our groups of friends and our Harvard years. But this year, our big 25, I’m dedicated to my mom and all of your parents that made it possible for us to be together in the spring in Cambridge. Thank you muma!